Relax...he's got this

 Did you know the US House of Representatives has open mic day?  After the grownups go home any Seinfeld wannabe can get up and try out new material for security guards, cleaners and puzzled tourists sitting in the gallery.  This week funnyman Glenn Grothman of the Wisconsin 6th broke in a monologue called "What's the deal with this French Revolution?"  "To this day some people view the French Revolution as something that should be looked upon favorably," he riffed, before complaining of "radical leftists in the mid-1800s" who found the family restricting and sought to reform it.  As a result, the patriarchal system which had served the West well for over two millennia lost its ability to keep women at home, control their property and earnings, if any, and take away their children if they made trouble.  That's why we're in this mess today, am I right?

Glenn says he read a book by Suzanne Desan, who is not some Regnery crackpot but a respected historian at the University of Wisconsin, Madison.  I haven't read her work so I can't comment on what triggered Grothman, but it's certain that the Revolution changed France right down to re-naming the months.  A lot of it certainly needed changing.  What he focused on was made clear last July when he accused feminism of "emasculating men" and accused government-funded childcare programs of providing "a basket of goodies for the mom" while depriving men of their capacity to support families.  He wants to reset the clock to 1960 before Lyndon Johnson's War on Poverty ruined everything.  He even worked in an attack on "Angela Davis, well-known communist," and of course "Hollywood and the mainstream media."  He's also opposed to Kwanzaa, Martin Luther King Day, Planned Parenthood, equal pay for women and LGBTQ rights, and would like to bring back the seven-day work week.  I knew the right was nostalgic for the good old days, but Bourbon France?

That speech was on July 12, two weeks before Joe Biden withdrew, so Grothman wasn't panicking at the prospect of a Black female president.  I wonder how he feels now as each day brings fresh evidence of Trump's mental unfitness to operate even a lemonade stand.  Today he Truthed, "I WON THE DEBATE!" explaining that Kamala Harris, Linsey Davis and David Muir are "mentally challenged people" vanquished by "one person of extraordinary genius."  He also reported a fantasy in which ABC is "under investigation."  Over the course of nine years he has learned to spell "genius" and to employ the phrase "word salad" so often applied to his "childcare is childcare"-type locutions.  Glass half full, Glenn.

Kamala has Taylor Swift, but Trump has picked up the endorsement of Latin singer Nicky Jam.  He was so proud that he boasted about it in Las Vegas:  "Latin music superstar Nicky Jam.  Do you know Nicky?  She's hot!"

   

                                                                  This is Nicky Jam.

Springfield, Ohio, remains a reluctant participant in Campaign/Brain dysfunction 2024.  Trump is promising to deport all the city's Haitians to Venezuela, while J.D. Vance reached back to the 1980s to revive the myth that Haitians spread HIV/AIDS.  Once again local officials say it's not true, and the candidate retorts that they don't have "all the evidence."  He insists HIV has "skyrocketed," along with TB.  And maybe peanut allergies, who knows?  Say anything.  It's not like there are a lot of unhinged people with guns around.

  

Here's Donnie at Ground Zero, New York City, where even Vance behaved respectfully during the moment of silence.

Here's Donnie in Shanksville, Pennsylvania, fist-pumping for the cameras like it's one of his rallies.

Here's Donnie at Bedminster with new advisor Laura Loomer.  Doesn't he look ten years younger?  All right, five.  Six months.  Where's Melania?  Working herself to a shadow promoting her "compelling and inspirational" memoir, Melania.  Free sample:  "The 2020 election results changed our lives forever.  It impacted our quality of life, cost of food, gasoline, safety, and even the geopolitical landscape."  Does our mean the country, the world, or the couple who thereafter had to pay for their own food and gas?  Needs context, as the Times would say.  Is he about to grab her by the --

Trump has been manipulating his sorry Trump Media & Technology stock, announcing yesterday that he does not plan to sell his majority stake.  (Who would buy it, "Leon" Musk?)  As always when they see volatility the NASDAQ suspended trading, causing Trump to lose his shit:  "What right do they have to do this?  Are they taking orders from the SEC?"  His victimization has no bottom.

At least one Buckeye hasn't lost his sense of humor.  Lieutenant Governor Jon Husted Xweeted a picture of two Canada geese and wrote, "Most Americans agree that these migrants should be deported."  As bomb threats close schools and government offices, and as Haitians keep their children indoors and install security cameras on their houses, it's good to know Republicans can keep smiling.