The Prion King

 The National Institute of Allergy and Infectious Diseases defines prion diseases as "transmissible, untreatable and fatal brain diseases of mammals."  The esteemed Charles P. Pierce has long diagnosed prion disease as the reason Republicans are this way.  It's the "transmissible" part I want to start with today.

Nobody has spent more time cuddling up to Trump than Sean Hannity, and a piece at Meidas suggests he may have come down with the condition.  During his regularly scheduled attack on Joe Biden's mental functions he addressed Rep. Michael Waltz as "Florida," referred to AOC (Rep. Ocasio Cortez) as "AOL," introduced Kellyanne Conway as "Kellyanne Trump" and Texas AG Ken Paxton as "Governor Paxton."  Is Hannity too incapacitated to serve as a Fox host?  (If he's correct in calling Ted Cruz a "former Texas senator," I promise to apologize as soon as I uncork the champagne.)

Perhaps sensing an opening in the prime time schedule -- if, say, Hannity gets an offer from Russia Tonight -- Brian Kilmeade has stepped up his defense of the convicted felon.  "People are talking about how Trump's losing it because Biden's losing it, too.  Trump's kidding around!  He's having fun!  He's talking about Hannibal Lecter...He's playing around."  No prion.  No prion.  You're the prion.  It's all rope-a-dope, like Trump's promise to throw the first debate.  What sentient person could confuse Nancy Pelosi with Nikki Haley?  You libs have no sense of humor.  Stupid libs.

Trumprion, if I may invent a term, is spreading to the states.  Yesterday we met Mary Morrissey, the Vermont state representative who thought it was cute to pour water into a Democratic colleague's tote bag.  Today it's Michigan state rep Neil Friske, arrested in Lansing early this morning for the "felony-level" offense of possessing and possibly firing a gun.  Is he a proud member of the House Freedom Caucus?  Is his campaign blaming the arrest on his primary opponent?  Was Friske allegedly pursuing an "adult dancer" at 2:45 am?  Yes, yes and yes.  Is it pronounced "frisky"?  Oh, please.

Missouri attorney general Andrew Bailey is suing New York for "their direct attack on our democratic process through unconstitutional lawfare against President [sic] Trump."  Preventing a criminal from campaigning, he says, "sabotages Missourians' right to a free and fair election."  Has anyone else noticed Trump being prevented from making demented speeches and posting semi-literate rants as he has done every day for nine years?  Thanks, I thought I was getting forgetful.

Appearing on podcasts, too, like All-In, a symposium of Silicon Valley tech bros.  He related a "Sir" story about why he released only a few records concerning the John F. Kennedy assassination -- pressure from the CIA, of course.  "I think the CIA was probably behind it."  Belief in conspiracy theories is an important symptom of Trumprion.  One of his most generous supporters, Timothy Mellon, has been studying grainy photos of what may be a 1937 Lockheed Electra on the bottom of the ocean and decided they prove that Amelia Earhart and her navigator Fred Noonan committed suicide -- with cellophane bags and a bottle of nitrogen, don't leave on a circumnavigation of the world without them!  He sounds like a natural.  I can't wait to hear his theories on covid and Ashkenazi Jews.

Trumprion is at pandemic levels in Florida and Texas, but while life there deteriorates, we haven't been paying enough attention to Louisiana.  The Oil-Soaked Pelican state is ranked 44th in opportunity, 46th in health care, 47th in education, 49th in environment and infrastructure and dead last in crime and corrections.  The petrochemical industry loves it, though, and I guess that's something.  It afflicts the rest of us with ambulatory garbage like John Neely Kennedy and Mike Johnson.  But there's reason for hope:  Under a law signed yesterday by Governor Jeff Landry, some version of the Ten Commandments (presumably King James, the only one that counts) will be displayed in every classroom from kindergarten through college, next to a poster of Charlton Heston as Moses.  I'm kidding about Heston.  I wish I was kidding about the whole mess.  Before he became famous for being banned from places where teenage girls congregate, Judge Roy Moore tried to install the Commandments in concrete outside his Alabama courthouse.  It didn't happen, but Landry likes his chances with the Sleazy Six.  "If you want to respect the rule of law, you've got to start from the original lawgiver, which was Moses," Landry explained.  He went to school in Louisiana (No. 47), so he has never heard of Hammurabi.

"I LOVE THE TEN COMMANDMENTS IN PUBLIC SCHOOLS, PRIVATE SCHOOLS, AND MANY OTHER PLACES," the adulterous felon wrote on his vanishing platform.  "READ IT -- HOW CAN WE AS A NATION GO WRONG???  THIS MAY BE, IN FACT, THE FIRST MAJOR STEP IN THE REVIVAL OF RELIGION, WHICH IS DESPERATELY NEEDED, IN OUR COUNTRY."  No more ass-coveting, no more bearing false witness.  Read it, he says.  

Then read this:  When the Fox poll showing Biden's gains among rural voters came out, the scoffers were sure it was fake.  "My district is in rural northwest Georgia and it is SOLIDLY supporting Trump!" said Margie Greene.  "Same with most of rural America!  Smart people!"  Put down the banjo and listen to this Ohio farmer:  "Our allies retaliated by going after our soft underbelly:  our agriculture," Christopher Gibbs told the Guardian.  He was talking about the 2018 Helsinki summit where Trump sided with Putin against American agencies that tried to indict Russian agents who interfered in the 2016 election.  When China stopped buying American soybeans, Gibbs "lost 20% of the value of my crop overnight."  Trump still can't understand tariffs or why they hurt Americans.  Farmers are also in the front line of climate change.  Political change is coming and it may not have much effect this year, but activists are looking ahead to 2028.  As the gentlelady says, smart people.