Negative light

 It's not Milton's "darkness visible," a concept as arresting as a Zen koan.  It's just bad.  While America is distracted by the war on California, the National Park Service, under the other disaster from the Dakotas Doug Burgum, is asking visitors to help cancel content that "inappropriately disparages Americans past or living and instead focuses on the greatness of the achievements and progress of the American people."  Forget about trying to find your way to the Little Big Horn this summer -- the famous victory achieved there in 1876 was won by Americans, just not the sort of Americans who matter anymore.  Burgum clearly believes that lying is the only path to "Restoring Truth and Sanity to American History," the classic executive order soon to be studied in our remaining public schools.  

It's called "unhistory," defined as "suppression, distortion or erasure of certain aspects of the past."  It's what Winston Smith did for a living, as distinct from Parson Weems inventing stories about Washington and the cherry tree to teach morality to children.  It is, needless to say, racist and misogynistic as fuck.  It's already happened from the Defense Department website to the National Archives.  Burgum is just more candid about it, or maybe a shade dumber.  Remember, this is the klutz who paid people to donate to his presidential campaign.

Of course, there is also actual obliteration.  The Leader's first term destroyed Jacqueline Kennedy's rose garden and today the bulldozers began ripping up the ground for paving.  During her contractual visits to the White House Melania objects even to walking on grass in her do-me pumps, so a patio is required.  Even grass is now considered woke.  

In addition, the lawn will be subjected to two enormous flagpoles, despite doing fine without them for over 200 years.  No president has had a personal flag before.

Too bad they won't be there for this year's Birthday Parade.  Neither will most of the increasingly irrelevant Congress, it seems.  The MAGA leadership cite various pressing engagements (family birthday, anniversary, Paris Air Show, washing their hair), with Rand Paul going further:  "Never been a big fan of goose-stepping soldiers and big tanks and missiles rolling down the street...we were always different than the images you saw of the Soviet Union and North Korea.  We were proud not to be that."  As if Americans could execute the Stechschritt.

With three days to spare, Peter Rothpletz reports that the parade organizers are looking for 2,000 historical military costumes, while designers are fitting them to 1,500 actors and others.  It sounds like this donnybrook would be better suited to the Tournament of Roses Parade.  Could someone find out if Pasadena has been burned to the ground yet?

Someone told Trump about NO KINGS and he's already threatening to meet demonstrations with "equal or greater force than we met right here," whatever that means.  One significant change from the Orwell playbook has already presented itself.  Where the Two Minutes' Hate always focused on the possibly fictitious Emmanuel Goldstein, Trump's version of Oceania features a rotating cast of Enemies of the People -- Anthony Fauci, Mark Milley, Joe Biden, Nancy Pelosi, Barack Obama, Amy Coney Barrett, Leonard Leo, etc., as needed.  This week it's Gavin Newsom, whose crime, according to Trump, was "running for governor."  It's a reflection of our shorter attention spans and Trump's advancing dementia.  Today he told a submissive and captive audience at Fort Confederate Seditionist Bragg, "I've known this guy [Biden] for a long time.  He was never the sharpest bulb."  If he's going to satirize himself I may as well write about Philip Larkin.  (The Daily Beast found it necessary to explain that.  I'm a little worried about them.)

It's contagious!  Not only that, we've identified a challenger for Dumbest Dummy in the Senate (to replace Tommy Tupperware).  Markwayne Mullin was over at the Fox News playing Mortimer Snerd to Trump's Edgar Bergen:  "The only thing Governor Newsom is good at right now is sucking at being a terrible governor."  Don't try to cram too many insults in there, Markwayne, you haven't had the practice.  "Why isn't California thriving like the rest of the country?"  California, Markwayne, is the fourth-largest economy in the world.  Without the money California sends to Washington, hellholes like Oklahoma couldn't keep the lights on.  There may be a little less this year because some buffoon called Trump flooded the Central Valley last February and fucked the farmers; if you were as smart as you think you are you wouldn't call attention to this catastrophic blunder.  So when you hit your knees tonight, thank "blue states ran [sic] by a DEI agenda" like New York and California, 'kay?  I'm done.  Go away.

Elon Musk doesn't want to be the object of a Two Truth Socials' Hate -- for the last couple of days he's been groveling like a common Jeff Bezos:

Daddy Musk says his tantrum was brought on by overwork in demolishing the federal government.  Elon sorry.  Elon bad boy.  Epstein?  Who's Epstein?

Shall we end with more unhistory?  Fort Braxton His-Own-Men-Tried-To-Kill-Him Bragg again:  "Recently other countries celebrated the victory of World War I.  France was celebrating.  Really. The only one that doesn't celebrate is the USA.  And we're the ones that won the war.  Without us you'd all be speaking German right now.  Maybe a little Japanese thrown in."  

Dead of World War I:  Germany 2,700,000.  Turkey (Ottoman Empire) 2,300,000.  Russia 2,300,000.  France 1,900,000.  Austria-Hungary 1,800,000.  UK/Ireland 1,300,000.  United States:  117,000.  

Yeah, we showed those Japanese.  They didn't mess with us again.