Life with daddy

 There's a stake in your fat black heart

And the villagers never liked you.

They are dancing and stamping on you.

They always knew it was you.

Daddy, daddy, you bastard, I'm through.

It was clear that Trump was in a fouler mood than usual when both Israel and Iran responded to his boasting with "What ceasefire?"  So when he got to The Hague and became Mark Rutte's problem, the NATO secretary general decided to try joshing -- "Daddy sometimes has to use strong language" -- lest the always mercurial, increasingly demented Leader blow up the whole alliance.  Asked if he was still committed to Article 5 (an attack on one is an attack on all), he maundered, "Depends on your definition.  There are numerous definitions of Article 5.  [There are not.]  You know that, right?  But I'm committed to being their friend...I'm going to give you an exact definition when I get there.  I just don't want to do it on the back of an airplane."  Translation:  He has no more idea what Article 5 is than who Sylvia Plath was.

Last week the G7 had to wave daddy goodbye because he wasn't having a good time and missed his blue banky.  This week NATO compressed its usual three-day meeting into one to accommodate his vanishing attention span and need to get home and spew more bile.  Also, dictators hate to be out of the country for long because that's when coups take place.  

"CNN is scum, MSDNC is scum, the New York Times is scum.  They're bad people, they're sick.  What they've done is they've tried to make this unbelievable victory into something less.  The generals and all of the people who did a good job, they get demeaned by these idiots at CNN who can't get ratings," he informed NATO.  Nobody blamed "the generals" because they weren't on social media congratulating themselves on "obliterating" Iran's chances of building a nuclear weapon.  A "leaked US intelligence report" says its program has been set back "a few months," and the IAEA won't confirm anything until its inspectors get in there.  Who could have leaked that report?  Has Tulsi Gabbard realized that it's the only way to get facts out?

Back home in the increasingly vandalized White House -- does he know it's not his to keep? -- Trump will cope better than he does in the wider world where people have to deal in reality.  This Cabinet of Dunces is far duncier than the first one.  We don't hear much about the Department of Housing and Urban Development and its token black secretary Scott Turner.  His first initiative is to house his department at the National Science Foundation, unhousing the 1,833 people who work there.  Science is for radical left liberals.  Turner himself requires an executive suite, an executive dining room, exclusive use of an elevator, possibly a health club, and reserved parking space for his five cars.  I remember when Ben Carson was satisfied with some expensive dining room furniture.  Also, he managed to drive to work in only one car.

Over at HHS, Roadkill Bob is promoting something called "wearables," devices to measure blood glucose and heart rate, which gave a nice bounce to the stock prices of Abbott and Dexcom.  "My vision is that every American is wearing a wearable within four years," he told the House Subcommittee on Health.  Orwellian?  Whatever do you mean?  HHS will run ads for them, reducing their expenditure on those "ask your doctor" commercials.  Any bets that Kennedy has a stake in one or both of these companies, like Stephen Miller's "six figure" investment in Palantir, the Peter Thiel outfit fattening off its ICEstapo contracts?

Mass abductions and deportations are such fun that regular folks want to get in on it.  Several people have been charged with impersonating ICE goons, which is easy because authentic goons do not have to show warrants, badges, or even their faces.  In Raleigh one of them took a woman to a motel and threatened deportation if she refused to have sex with him, which is kidnapping and rape.  Usually the victims are only robbed with the assumption that they will be afraid to go to the police.  One day someone will enumerate all the crimes committed by undocumented immigrants and compare them to the crimes the Trump regime has committed against them, and these should be counted, too.  

Having nailed down that Peace Prize, Trump decided to go for Economics:

He's watching.  And just in case they don't comply,

Isn't that nice?  He thinks the Department of Energy drills for oil.  Actually the Interior Department grants leases to private companies, but don't tell Gramps until after his nap.  Right now he's busy composing a rant about the probable next mayor of New York, Zohran Mamdani.

He'll have to work hard to out-ugly MAGA, with Laura Loomer predicting "9/11 2.0" (predicting?  She's lusting for it) and Elise Stefanik wailing, "My stomach is in knots."  City Council member Vickie Paladino called for Mamdani to be deported even before yesterday.  Charlie Kirk noticed a vast global conspiracy ("Are you comfortable with both London and New York having Muslim mayors?  I'm not").  And from far-off Florida Rep. Randy Fine warned that Mamdani will make all of America into "a Shiite caliphate."  Wow.  Just wow.  

Speaking of Florida, is it wrong that I feel sorry for Ron DeSantis?  Term-limited and utterly irrelevant, he struggles so hard for attention we should call him Governor Cellophane.  His Everglades prison for "illegals," Alligator Auschwitz, draws only yawns.  He predicts that real estate prices in Palm Beach will take off as real New Yorkers (the rich) flee the city and its "pro-Hamas activist" mayor.  Florida already has a bonus program to entice police who have run into trouble in other states because of brutality or other malfeasance; today he announced an additional sweetener for New York City police because the new mayor will abolish the NYPD.  Given the number of death threats against him encouraged by you and your fellow bigots, that would be a stupid thing to do, wouldn't it, Bootsie?

Did I say Economics?  I meant Literature, for Trump never gets enough credit for his improvements to our language.  In addition to many words ("I have the best words") he is a great phrase maker.  He came up with "America First" and now, according to his Boswell Karoline Leavitt, he has created "Peace Through Strength."  I think she's confusing it with "Strength Through Joy," but why quibble about details?  Trump is fully deserving of the first Nobel hat trick.