Dying is easy -- politics is hard

 Elon Musk does not like criticism, or as he calls it, "vicious and unethical attacks from the left."  Think how much we're going to be missing:  we won't have the Boer nazi to kick around anymore.  Yes, he's leaving "government," if that's the right word for the ninety-odd days of chaotic wrecking and gross illegality he helped his friend The Leader inflict on a country that was at peace with its neighbors and enjoying an economic renaissance that some economists called "the envy of the world."  We should throw him a party with balloons and orange punch.

Hillary Clinton is still being pilloried for using the phrase "basket of deplorables" and even earlier for warning of "a vast rightwing conspiracy," but sore-ass whining is a bedrock feature of the right.  The phrase I referenced above dates from 1962, when Nixon was defeated for governor of California and conceded by blaming the press ("give him the shaft") and going off to sulk for six well-remunerated years at a New York law firm before returning to politics and creating the first "enemies list."  Their symbol may be the elephant but their spirit animal is the grudge.  

They are all, as the great Durante used to observe, surrounded by assassins.  Self-criticism is not a possibility when you are always right.  Trump and Musk and their enablers make Nixon look like Lincoln offering "malice toward none and charity for all."  Cuck.

The excuse offered for the unMusking is that Tesla is collapsing without his guiding hand, as if people would queue to buy exploding cars and trucks that fall apart if he did commercials personally, like Friendly Fred pitching used Chevys on local TV.  He must be a genius because he's rich.  Many of his rockets lift off without catching fire, and under cover of ferreting out waste he has further enriched himself with government contracts such as the "iron dome" missile defense system, only made of gold and with chandeliers.  I guess he's entitled to a reasonably obscene profit for all his hard work (unpaid, and also unelected and unscrutinized by the Senate).  Also, his crime partner's demented tariffs are making it impossible to buy the aluminum he needs from China without selling some of his spawn.  Not that he isn't eager to spawn hundreds more.  

At any rate, the Age of Elon may be ending but the Age of Self-Pity has yet to climax.  As reports of his incompetence surface hourly, Pete Hegseth returned to the comfy couch of Fox News to blame The Deep State which has "come after me from Day One, just like they've come after President Trump."  All the botches of security don't matter because The Leader "asked me to bring warfighting back to the Pentagon."  As opposed to peacefighting.  Sure, sure, soothed Brian Kilmeade, it's all part of the "learning curve."  To make sure he's ready for his close-up Pete is installing a makeup studio next to the Pentagon briefing room, so America's foes won't see him sweat.

Security is a joke at the DoD but not at the Labor Department.  Secretary Lori Chavez-DeRemer has announced that anyone who talks to the press, former employees or anybody else will "face serious legal consequences," including prison (El Salvador?).  It's the Labor Department -- they compile statistics and theoretically make sure laws about union organizing and OSHA regulations are enforced.  What do they need all the secrecy for?  Are there still Deep Staters in the department who care about workers' rights?

Speaking of statistics, what do you make of these?  "Seventy-four percent of our kids cannot qualify for military service...a teenager today has less testosterone than a 68-year-old man.  Sperm counts are down fifty percent."  A crackpot or a cabinet secretary?  Why not both?  That was Roadkill Bob telling Jesse Watters why he wants to phase out eight artificial food dyes.  Even Watters was nonplussed.  Couple questions, Bob, or you can let Biff the Worm answer:  How much testosterone is required to join, say, the Navy?  When did they start including it in the physical?  Which 68-year-old man are we talking about?  Alec Baldwin is 67 and his wife Hilaria just gave birth to their seventh child.  Were food dyes a thing during the Vietnam War draft?   Since so many men lack the tiny swimmers to enlist, is this really a good time to discourage women from joining up?  Were you ever dropped on your head?

When Kennedy gets done remaking HHS it's safe to say we won't recognize it.  The Food and Drug Administration can no longer test milk because of firings in its food safety and nutrition division.  However, there are plenty of resources for yet another study of the long-debunked autism-vaccine connection by noted quack David Geier.  The Low Income Home Energy Assistance Program (LIHEAP)?  No staff to administer the $4.1 billion appropriated by Congress.  Head Start?  Stopped.  LGBTQ youth are four times more likely to attempt suicide than their peers, what with being blamed for everything from acid rain to Iran's nuclear program, but calling the national suicide hotline 988 will no longer connect them to trained counselors.   The American Cancer Society had to point out that there's no way research and treatment won't be affected by cutting 10,000 jobs.  Kennedy held a press conference yesterday to show off his lack of qualifications for his present job (making him no different from the rest of the choir that meets periodically to praise The Leader, known by courtesy as the Cabinet), but Robyn Pennacchia was there to rebut all the nonsense.  No human services, no health.  We're on our own.