The people's car

 Is MAGA at a turning point?

We have watched, amused and a little sickened, as they bought an array of crap disguised as "fundraising" merch -- hats, diapers, watches, Bibles, trading cards, worthless currency, mugs -- mostly made in China, as gaudy and shoddy as The Leader's personality, all to express their loyalty and love.  They ignored the buyer's remorse of the marks who enrolled in "Trump University" and not only didn't get rich but had to sue to get their money back.  

They took their "Trump Bucks" to real banks and tried to exchange them for real money.  They mocked Governor Walz as "Tampon Tim" while gluing sanitary pads over their ears in imitation of Nearly Martyred Leader.  Some of us laughed; others wondered what they were skimping on to keep their cult leader in luxury (vacations, child support payments, clothes, dentistry, nights out?).  We quietly updated Phineas T. Barnum -- there's one born every four seconds, mostly in Ohio.

The grift may have reached its climax:

Not being a Republican, Conservative or Great American, I don't feel it's addressed to me.  But what about those who are?  In case you don't or can't read the Social Truths, he spelled it out by filming an actual commercial for Tesla.  In front of the White House.  Reading from a script.  I swear, that's his soft little hand.

GM, Ford, Toyota and the rest are already struggling to figure out how The Leader's tariff whimsy is screwing them over today and he's ordering the cult to trade in their Rustmobiles for one of these tumor-ugly conveyances, starting at $79,990.  Close your eyes and picture Joe Biden doing a pitch for Pizza Hut or American Airlines.  On Fox & Friends the white couch would be on fire.  Even Democrats would be filing articles of impeachment.  How is this even legal?  An antiquated concept.

Does he know they run on batteries?  What if they get wet?  What about all the oil we're drilling for?  I thought carbon-burning cars and trucks were totally patriotic, while electric cars were for Radical Left Lunatics in foreign countries like California.  What's special about these electric cars?  Oh, wait...

"Elon Musk has signaled to President Trump's advisers in recent days that he wants to put $100 million dollars into groups controlled by the Trump political operation, according to three people with knowledge of the matter."

If somebody keys your Prius or crumples the fender of your Malibu, call the insurance company and hope they don't raise your premium.  If somebody smashes the window of your showroom and makes off with a new Buick, you may be covered.  If your uninsured kid totals the Hyundai you're shit out of luck.  Another reason to buy a Tesla:

"Speaker Mike Johnson on Wednesday said Congress will probe 'domestic terrorism' attacks targeting the Tesla car brand after vehicles and storefronts were vandalized."  Sounds like something Kristi "Flamethrower" Noem should get in on, too.  Greasy Pete could put the 82nd Airborne on alert.  No other car has ever had this level of protection lavished on it.  Truly it is the People's Car.  And if you own one and the brakes crap out, don't even think about complaining, here or in China.

Elsewhere, everything is fine.

"...a passenger on a small regional flight to Miami attacked a flight attendant, kicked and punched the seat of the person in front of him, and swallowed rosary beads as pilots returned to the airport in Savannah, Georgia.  The passenger was traveling with his sister, who said her brother told her before the violent outburst to 'close her eyes and pray because Satan's disciple(s) had followed them onto the plane.'"  Yes, the devil went down to Georgia and then decided he'd rather be in Florida.

Roadkill Bob was on Fox ("Where science goes to die") assuring Sean Hannity that everyone must get stoned measles.  "It used to be when I was a kid that everybody got measles, and the measles gave you lifetime protection against measles infection," he rasped.  "The vaccine doesn't do that."  The host did not inquire if the same is true of polio or suggest that he might be confusing it with tetanus, which does indeed require boosters.  

Gavin Newsom's creatively titled podcast This Is Gavin Newsom has become the hot spot for fascists since Joe Rogan slipped to third place on Spotify.  Today he sat down with Steve Bannon to ask why Elon Musk is afraid of him.  Or if he is.  Or if he still considers him a "parasitic illegal alien."  The self-described "mick that yells into a microphone" refused to be pinned down, possibly fearing terrorism charges.  You can't blame him -- who needs more jail time?

We are in the middle of a week-long boycott of Amazon, and the idea is spreading fast.  Today's Guardian reports a rejection of American goods throughout Europe and Canada.  The latter has seen the growth of apps which allow buyers to scan barcodes to determine if the item originated in the US before purchasing -- or as it will soon be called here, an "act of war."  Tourism by Canadians is already down by 23 percent; a Danish grocery company is identifying European products with a black star for shoppers who want to avoid American goods.  In the UK a boycott of Tesla is growing -- organizers call it "taking back power," borrowing the slogan of the Brexiteers.  They cite the "horrible racism" of the Trump administration, among other concerns.  Both Europe and Canada are enacting "retaliatory tariffs."  What did Grandpa Syphilis think they'd do, thank him with tears in their eyes?

When Ontario Premier Doug Ford announced and then rescinded a surcharge on electricity the province supplies to three US states, The Leader went predictably bugfuck:  "Why would our Country allow another Country to supply us with electricity, even for a small area?  Who made these decisions, and why?  And can you imagine Canada stooping so low as to use ELECTRICITY, that so affects the life of innocent people, as a bargaining chip and threat?"  Well, now we know:  It's in the United States-Mexico-Canada Agreement (USMCA), which replaced NAFTA ("our Country's worst Trade Deal") in January 2020.  Let's see, what asshole was president then?

Oh, yeah.  I didn't recognize him.  He's stopped dyeing his hair.  Sherwin Williams Sunburst Yellow, wasn't it?

Double points to the Texas "terrorists" who stole all the wheels from eleven unsold Teslas in an Amazon parking lot in February.  Next time could you work in something to do with Russia?