No surprises
Even if you are not in the path of Hurricane Debby, you probably don't need any shocks, upsets or sudden noises from the underbrush. It's Monday and that's bad enough. So let's run down the "Well, duh" news as of this morning.
We finally know who put the dead bear cub in Central Park in 2014 and it was Robert F. Kennedy, Jr. He says he was out falconing with some drunk friends in the Hudson Valley. He says the bear was dead when they came across it. He says he thought it would be funny to put it next to an old bicycle he just happened to have so people would think a biker hit the cub in the park. He says he was afraid the New Yorker had the story so he decided to get in front of it by making a video with Roseanne Barr. He says he was no longer doing heroin at that point and that Biff the brain worm was already dead. He says he wants to be president of the United States to end the epidemic of vaccination that has kept polio, measles, diphtheria and other diseases from destroying millions of people. Any questions?
Trump called Shawn Fain, president of the United Auto Workers, "a stupid person" because the union endorsed Kamala Harris.
Trump shared (or more likely was given) a video of Kamala Harris cooking Indian food with Mindy Kaling to prove that she is Indian and not Black, because no one can be both. Also, only Indians are allowed to cook Indian food.
"Abortion in this country is not about protecting the lives of mothers. It's about killing the child because you weren't responsible enough to keep your skirt down," says Mark Robinson in a typical devaluation of women's lives. Turns out his wife Yolanda Hill had an abortion thirty years ago and it was so traumatic that he uses it in his campaign ads, without revealing whether her skirt was up or down. Apparently she's fine with that. (Roe v. Wade was decided on the basis of a woman's right to privacy and the wives of Republicans have none.)
The Belgian mixed triathlon team withdrew from the Olympics after Claire Michel got sick, probably as a result of swimming in the Seine. An American competitor, Seth Rider, "joked" that he raised his E. coli tolerance by no longer washing his hands after using the toilet. It sounds like a good plan.
Frank L. Carillo of Virginia was the first person to be arrested for threatening the life of Kamala Harris. He stood out from the crowd by proposing to burn her alive.
While his wife busies herself running the Republican National Committee, Eric Trump has appointed himself the nemesis of the Duke and Duchess of Sussex, a/k/a Harry and Meghan. They have caused so much pain to the "sacred" royal family, with which the Trumps are obsessed. "You can have spoiled apples in every orchard," said the 40-year-old man-baby who stole money from a children's cancer charity. His daddy hinted that the couple could be deported if Harry lied about prior drug use on his visa application. Trump must wake up every day thinking of people he wants to deport.
Usha Vance, who has two children and thinks cats are icky, went on Fox to defend her husband's slander of women who don't breed to Ainsley Earhardt. "The reality is, he made a quip in service of making a point that was substantive and it had actual meaning," she clarified. He's actually very concerned about how hard it is to raise children in a country full of book-banners, religious fanatics and politicians who refuse to vote for a child tax credit. No, wait, that's the opposite of what she said. Sorry. If she's OK with JayDee calling theirs a "two-colored" marriage she must be pretty hard to rattle.
Did you know that an EV charger is "a gas pump with electricity coming through it"? That's how Trump explained it to the sparse crowd at GSU. Considering how hard Tesla CEO Musk is working to amass voter data for him, he might at least try to learn about the technology. Especially since a "streamer" called Adin Ross has just presented him with this hideous Muskmobile as payment for an interview.
Neil Gorsuch thinks Joe Biden should "be careful" about his radical proposals for cleaning up Supreme Court corruption. "I'm not going to get into what is now a political issue during a presidential election year," he went on, despite the fact that even appearing on Fox News is a political act. Gorsuch, who has his job because Mitch McConnell refused to recognize Barack Obama's right to fill a vacancy for reasons he made up, thinks "the independent judiciary means that when you're unpopular you can get a fair hearing under the law," especially if your name is Leo or Crow.
In a related matter, Senator Ron Wyden has discovered still more unreported goodies that Clarence Thomas received from super-generous Harlan Crow in 2010. What's the statute of limitations for bribery?
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