Be very afraid

 


Everyone knows Joe Biden can control the weather.  But the Superbowl?  Before you get into the office pool, read this carefully argued Xitter post by Vivek Ramaswamy hinting that the endorsement of Taylor Swift rests on a Kansas City victory over San Francisco next month.  No Democrat has ever won a second term without Swift's OK.  It's just political science.  (Swift herself is controlled by George Soros, the hidden master of the universe.)  You can tell from her songs.  Soros forces Ted Cruz to attend all games involving Texas teams so they won't make the final.  I could tell you how Cruz does this but I'd have to kill you.

The presidential race got more complicated over the weekend as Trump won the coveted Snoop Dogg endorsement.  He pardoned Michael Harris, Mr. Dogg's partner in Death Row Records, so all the rape and racism are wiped off the slate, like Harris's convictions for attempted murder and drug trafficking.

Retired Judge Barbara Jones was appointed by Judge Arthur Engoron to oversee the financial records of the Trump Organization.  But according to his lawyers, she is nothing less than Inspector Javert relentlessly hounding poor Donald by reporting the numerous incomplete filings and inconsistencies she was given.  And all to favor "her continued receipt of millions in excessive fees."  Oh, what a world, what a world.

"I fully condemn the dangerous violence and destruction that occurred today at the US Capitol...the perpetrators of this un-American violence and destruction must be prosecuted to the fullest extent of the law."  Who wrote that on January 6, 2021?  No, it was Elise Stefanik.  She has deleted it, of course, but Liz Cheney knows about the Wayback Machine and shared it with her Xitter followers.  Recall what Lyndon Johnson said about a critic  ("I'd rather have him inside the tent pissing out than outside the tent pissing in") before you exile people from the Gang of Putin for being insufficiently MAGA.

The 350 residents of Cape Ray, Newfoundland, were thrilled to find a nineteenth century shipwreck just off their beach.  It's believed that the wreck was dislodged from the ocean floor by coastal erosion and last year's Tropical Storm Fiona.  They hope it can be explored before natural forces carry it off again.

In news of a more recent wreck, former Air Force intelligence officer Tony Romeo thinks he has located the Lockheed Electra of Amelia Earhart which disappeared in 1937.  Romeo has sonar images that appear to show a plane on the bottom of the Pacific.  Of course, there are plenty of those.

As Trump continues to rant about the verdict (when not re-asserting how he once passed a dementia test), E. Jean Carroll told George Stephanopoulos she intends to share her $83.6 million with "something Donald Trump hates."  One possibility she suggested was "a fund for the women who have been sexually assaulted by Trump."  Keep a few million for yourself, Ms. Carroll!



















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