Is it over yet?
OUT: Saying "This is not my time," Mike Pence has "suspended" or "ended" his presidential campaign, depending on what source you read. The people who wanted to hang him on January 6, 2021, want to hang him today, and they outnumber the people who just don't like him. Already his brand of Christofascism has been superseded by Mike Johnson's. So long, Mike Pence.
IN: Rep. Dean Phillips (D-MN) has announced that he will challenge Joe Biden for the nomination because, although he has fully supported Biden's agenda, the president is just too old. All the news media say so, and are they ever wrong? Phillips compares himself to Eugene McCarthy, the Minnesotan who challenged Lyndon Johnson in 1968 and finished second in New Hampshire, which nevertheless led Johnson to announce the end of his candidacy. A few small differences: Johnson and McCarthy had one serious point of contention, the war in Vietnam, in which Phillips's father died shortly after he was born. Also, McCarthy was not the plutocrat heir to a gelato and liquor fortune, one of these "politics is just like business" types. And McCarthy -- I'm guessing here -- would have returned a contribution from Harlan Crow, CFO of Clarence Thomas Enterprises.
Crow's generosity knows no bounds, for he also donated the official max of $2,800 to Cornel West, this year's official Jill Stein spoiler. West says he spurned the money but the self-styled "progressive activist" is still very much IN. It's not clear if he is still frequenting Rumble in the company of British creep Russell Brand, whose difficulties with rape accusations were all over the papers before being shunted aside by the war in Gaza. West has broken with the Green Party and will run as an independent.
Non-progressive Larry Elder is also OUT. For those who knew he was running, the right-wing radio talker wishes it known that he has thrown all his support behind Trump. And Kanye West, not to be confused with Cornel, says he's not even running for president, so he probably will (not necessarily on this planet).
Ron DeSantis's campaign has had a problem raising funds, but fortunately, he's a governor with untapped resources: companies that do business with Florida and want to go on doing so. Some generous donors so far include the Seminole Tribe (gambling interests), the GEO Group (operator of private prisons), and AshBritt, a disaster recovery company. So Puddin' Paws is IN, despite lukewarm support from Republican voters who prefer Nikki Haley to him and Trump to their own families.
Robert F. Kennedy, Jr., is IN despite a campaign that resembles the story of the six blind men describing an elephant. It's a tree, no, it's a wall, no, it's a rope. A man described as a real estate agent entered his property this week and the already paranoid Kennedy is demanding Secret Service protection. Since he's sure the CIA is out to get him, why he would trust another government force is a good question. His official support from the far right began to crumble when polls showed that he was draining tinfoil-hat voters from Trump. Sean Hannity worked him over on Fox and now Junior Trump is calling him "a Democrat plant to hurt the Trump thing," which is an odd way to talk about Daddy. Since Kennedy's own siblings have made their disgust plain, he must be feeling lonely repeating the same conspiracy theories and weird claims about cell phones. (I assume he has a panic room in case the Jehovah Witnesses ring the bell.) He has "questions" about 9/11 and probably thinks the Hamas attacks were a "false flag" operation. Don't try heroin.
Anyway, the next edition of Authoritarian Jeopardy! will take place November 8 in Miami, with Haley, Chris Christie, Tim Scott, Vivek Ramaswamy and maybe a surprise guest like Doug Burgum, who knows? Christie will say all the things about Trump he never dared say to the big orange face, Scott will insist that racism doesn't exist, Ramaswamy will preen and tell us how government is the problem and Burgum (if he's invited) will just be so damn glad to be out of North Dakota in November. Here's some of them, try to guess the names.
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